Headphones rule.
No headphones = you can talk to me
1 headphone = you can talk to me if I like you
2 headphones = fuck off
My dad just emailed me this huge list of puns oh my god
- When chemists die, they barium.
- I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
- This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
- I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
- We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
- Broken pencils are pointless.
- What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
- All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
- Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
- The earthquake in Washington obviously was the Government's fault.
-
I’ll never be good enough for anyone.
What ever I like, or say, or do is always a fucking problem.
This is how I feel all the time
all the time, guys, all the time …
i think 60% of my life consists of me laughing by myself
